I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize
