Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
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