Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize
