Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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