i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Randomize
