You can't special order awesome
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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