Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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