Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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