I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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