she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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