He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
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It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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