I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize
