Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
try to milk me bitch
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