You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
