Got a toothbrush?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Randomize
