I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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