i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
