I CAN MOONWALK!
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
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...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
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i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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