oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
wow bdsm is so cute
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
