I feel great
I just peed on a car
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize
