Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me http://tfl.nu/x1tc
  Replies (8) Good night (1406) Bad night (1502)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style. http://tfl.nu/7qxu
  Replies (31) Good night (2138) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I cut my penus on the lid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): I cut my penus on the lid. http://tfl.nu/uger
  Replies (38) Good night (578) Bad night (6193)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever http://tfl.nu/se2n
  Replies (47) Good night (6837) Bad night (926)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  dibs on John Mayer's hood pass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): dibs on John Mayer's hood pass http://tfl.nu/rqbz
  Replies (35) Good night (2643) Bad night (863)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (631): You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone http://tfl.nu/0bcu
  Replies (4) Good night (4372) Bad night (940)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night. http://tfl.nu/zm02
  Replies (4) Good night (2875) Bad night (755)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk! http://tfl.nu/py4j
  Replies (6) Good night (3545) Bad night (879)
• Favorite

  (785): View more from Kansas

  Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (785): Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference? http://tfl.nu/d4sd
  Replies (7) Good night (1865) Bad night (840)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I feel like death gave me a hand job

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I feel like death gave me a hand job http://tfl.nu/81uy
  Replies (12) Good night (543) Bad night (1557)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (202): Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation. http://tfl.nu/g1cn
  Replies (9) Good night (1052) Bad night (545)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you http://tfl.nu/bix8
  Replies (9) Good night (1220) Bad night (854)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches http://tfl.nu/40rq
  Replies (1) Good night (1114) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead. http://tfl.nu/ww0m
  Replies (3) Good night (857) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations. http://tfl.nu/2l5l
  Replies (14) Good night (1470) Bad night (393)

Randomize