I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
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