Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Randomize
