Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
cat food counts as protein by the way
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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