That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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