Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
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Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
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look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
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