Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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