i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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