two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
