I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
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