I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
