handjob tips. give me some.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Randomize
