Whod you bang
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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