Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize