And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
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