I'll bet she douches with gravy.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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