real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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