dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize