i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
