This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Randomize
