You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
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