grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
Randomize
