I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
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