Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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