he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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