just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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