he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
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