So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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