awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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