this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
