Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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